Perfect Hair Forever

Pilot

Nov 6, 2005

The first episode concerns a young boy named Gerald who is on a quest to find the perfect hair due to his extremely premature baldness. He seeks help from his "Uncle Grandfather", a pervert who loves to eat and watch his young schoolgirl companion, Brenda, dance around in a short mini-skirt and thong. Also of no particular help is the "Action Hot Dog", which is a hot dog which chants annoyingly "do the la la la la!" The Hot Dog's comments prompt Gerald to proclaim, "That's an annoying hot dog." The hero soon enters a forest, in which he encounters Cat Man (a belligerent man apparently dressed in a cat costume), an odd cloud (possibly a spoof of the Flying Nimbus from the Dragon Ball series; at one point, Uncle Grandfather refers to Gerald as "Gerald Bald Z"), Space Ghost being mauled by a Bear, and other insanity involving his grand nemesis, the evil Coiffio who is "the evil controller of cats", his Gundam-like robot companion, 'Model Robot', and his arboreal agent, the Inappropriate Comedy Tree (who proudly proclaims "I have sex with dogs... what's up with that?!"). The end credits are written in the Wingdings font and use the song "Love Theme" by Eddie Horst which was later made available on page 2 of the Adult Swim website's downloads page. The credits roll over live action footage of a "dancing clown" windsock.

TiVo Your Ebay

Nov 26, 2005

The second episode features an opening theme song by Brendon Small which is a stylistic parody of the opening for The Big O. This episode has Gerald walking through the forest where he left off with the "Action Hot Dog" following him as a companion. Meanwhile, Uncle Grandfather is interrupted from his "Horsey Ride" (wherein he sits on Brenda's shoulders as she runs about) by a young man dressed in a shiny purple coat who claims to be "King of all Animals". Although he is not "a nude," as per Uncle Grandfather's wishes, the young man gives a typical anime technobabble explanation about some random tragedy which is a mishmash of references to shows Yu-Gi-Oh, Blue Gender, and Wolf's Rain. Uncle Grandfather commands him to fight Brenda for three minutes while Uncle Grandfather looks at porn. After Uncle Grandfather has had his fill of erotica, he calls out to the young man in purple (who in the meantime has subdued Brenda and is spanking her), and tells him that he can see he is a "scholar of bosoms" and bestows upon him a special gift: a hamburger necklace, "For snacking," explains Uncle Grandfather. This necklace is a possible parody of Yu-Gi-Oh's Millennium Puzzle which the main character wears on a chain around his neck. He is then sent off to assist Gerald on his quest, accompanied by a group of loud, cacophonous animals crammed into an economy hatchback and the bear from the first episode. Meanwhile, Gerald is confronted by a flame-like entity named Rod, who calls himself the "Anime God". He then proceeds to demonstrate his "power" by telling Gerald and Hotdog to do his grocery shopping for him at the exact store where Catman happens to work. Coiffio sends Catman after him, but he is soon thwarted and Gerald makes his way to his destination, Tuna Mountain, albeit followed by the Inappropriate Comedy Tree.

Cat Snatch Fever

Dec 3, 2005

The third episode features an opening theme song by the band Melt-Banana called "Hair-cat ('Cause the wolf is a cat!)". This episode also reveals the Inappropriate Comedy Tree's real name, Norman Douglas. After telling a rather loud [and wet], story about why he left Coiffio and how much he loves his new jeans, he joins Gerald and Hot Dog on their quest. However, their [relative] happiness did not last, as they were then accosted by a freak tornado. Uncle Grandfather watches in amusement from his roof, remarking "Oh man, the Tornado is about to suck up my bald nephew...heh heh heh, awesome. So much for that retarded journey". Upon going back inside, Rod suddenly appears before him. After a brief and pointless exchange of words, Rod proceeds to tell Uncle Grandfather that Gerald and Co. are still alive. Uncle Grandfather tells Rod to shut up, and proceeds to summon a hot dog bun to ensnare him. Rod disappears, and Uncle Grandfather sends the bun to find Gerald and tell him an important message. He then calls Brenda, proclaiming that he has news of the utmost importance, and drops some change on the ground. Brenda picks it up, with Uncle Grandfather watching, while eating a banana "Mmmm, bananana-na". Meanwhile, the tornado turns out to be a friendly, if somewhat unstable, creature named Terry/Twisty (he seems to only answer to one of those names at a given time, and becomes enraged if he's not referred to by the one he prefers, although Norman's loud talking has a similar effect). Coiffio, in his oddly phallic-shaped spaceship (complete with testicle-shaped engine nacelles), is bathing in his hot tub. He goes on about how he needs his robe to cover his "hot bod", while badly mispronouncing words in a Porky Pig-like manner. He goes off to talk to Catman, and once again, achieves next to nothing. The Animal King, while arguing with his animal subjects, succeeds in driving right into a ditch. Gerald, while walking along, begins to hear voices in the stump of his severed ear (cut off by Brenda in the pilot), and the scene shifts to Brenda in a dark room, whispering in Japanese, into Gerald's ear. Uncle Grandfather bursts into the room, accompanied by unidentified policemen saying that Brenda has caused the beginning of the Cat-Bun Wars! The last scene shows the armies of each side converging on each other, ready to fight for reasons unknown. After the credits, Coiffio plays a little tune, which seems to be a parody of Bob Dylan.

Happy Suck Day

Dec 10, 2005

The episode begins with the Cat-Bun Wars in progress. The Young Man and his animals (featuring MF DOOM as a giraffe) hear the battle from the ditch, which is in the middle of the battlefield. The Young Man tries to use the hamburger necklace, which is stolen by Astronomic Cat, along with his hand. The opening sequence plays, which shows neon-colored versions of all the characters flying around in the dark, with Gerald constantly walking. Space Cat takes the necklace and the Young Man's hand to Coiffio, who then demands Model Robot turn in into an A-Bomb. Model Robot does so, explodes, and sends Coiffio into space. He then sings a song about Model Robot. Coiffio drifts back to the ship, where Rod tries to buy his house from him. Coiffio commands Space Cat to run a background check on him. At the grocery store where Catman works, Catman sells a 12-pack to a baby. Coiffio parachutes in to the front of the store, just to be run over by the drunk-driving baby and shot by Catman, who doesn't care about his problems. The baby drives into the ditch with the Young Man and the animals. Uncle Grandfather tries to videotape a vacuum cleaner having sex with a cake, but is asked to end the Cat-Bun Wars. He does so by asking the leaders from the Cats (General Meow) and from the Buns (Commander Bun) to sign a peace treaty, complaining that he has things to do. The episode ends with the Young Man still stuck in the hole with the animals and the drunk baby. Coiffio is still after Gerald. Uncle Grandfather is still taping his porno about the vacuum and cake, when he is suddenly held at gunpoint by an MP. The credits roll, with neon Gerald walking far into the distance. The end theme is by DangerDoom.

Tusk

Dec 17, 2005

The ending theme song for this episode is performed by Widespread Panic, although the episode opens only with the mangled statement, "We now journey the join... uhh... already in progress." Twisty and Norman Douglas get into a knife fight while Gerald and Hotdog go off without them. After Gerald runs into Catman and his trailer in the forest, and is offered LSD by Rod, Coiffio shows up on an oversized motorcycle whose spokes are made of hot dogs, and challenges Gerald to a race to the death ("choppa-duew"). In exchange for Coiffio agreeing to sell his house to him, and Gerald agreeing to buy Rod's Journey tickets, Rod magically transports the two (along with most of the other characters) to a racetrack, where buns (singing Hotdog's trademark "Do Da La La La") and cats (meowing) fill the stands, and the Young Man and the giraffe provide the commentary from the booth. Catman releases an alligator onto the track to attack Gerald (and prevent him from "wictory"), but it goes after Coiffio instead. Astronomic Cat lifts the alligator off of Coiffio's bike and onto Gerald's, but Hotdog transforms into a "wienercycle" and saves Gerald by dueling with the gator. Gerald appears to have the advantage when Coiffio's hair falls off, but he abandons the race when he sees a chance to launch his bike to Tuna Mountain.

Woke Up Drunk

Dec 24, 2005

During a parody of 50s variety shows and mainstream American sitcoms, Gerald and his companions come ever closer to Tuna Mountain after several musical and laughtrack segments (In one scene see Felix the Bear wrestling with a shark, possibly a reference to a novel (Bear v Shark) by Chris Bachelder) along with a conference by worried corporate television executives over the poor audience reaction to "Japanese Bear Dad" (the bear chasing Space Ghost in Episode 1). The executives are rudely interrupted by a drunken Space Ghost looking for work, likely as a self-referential joke to the now cancelled/permanently hiatical Space Ghost Coast to Coast). Eventually we see Gerald and his companions continue walking toward Tuna Mountain. At the end, we see three military policemen in bed, apparently having sex though none of them move (they just remain in their usual "attention" position, and they blame standards for not allowing them to thrust). The end theme is by Diplo.